Posts
Where in the World is D Today?
Honestly?.... Trying to decide if he’ll be happier ignoring Christmas or embracing it.
Ok… Really…. I can’t fully ignore Christmas. Even though Taiwan doesn’t “celebrate” Christmas, It definitely recognizes it.
In 48 years, I have never been alone and away from my family on Christmas. Never. Today, I am somewhere in the range of 7700 miles from all that is most dear to me on a High Holiday on the Christian calendar. As an adult, Christmas has always been a religious holiday, the celebrating of the birth of Christ. And until the arrival of Sean and Tim in my life, I’d been generally underwhelmed by all the Christmas “hype”. The emphasis on Santa and materialism makes me into a real scrooge.
I’ve tended to even-keeled outwardly when it comes to holidays and the sort. But I feel them deeply.
In my lesson to my third graders I explained how my family comes together at Christmas. They were SHOCKED at how large my family is and that often times I don’t know all the names of the people in the room. But I don’t have to know your name to love you. If you’re family, it’s all good. Give me a hug and kiss! Those hugs and kiss is what I am going to miss the most. We love on you outwardly in my family. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE those big deep hugs and kisses on the cheek. The smile of recognition when you come into the room is utterly and completely validating. In my family you can ALWAYS come home. We WANT you home, and MISS you when you’re not there…. (pause….. fighting back the tears now. This is why I was trying to ignore the day.)…….. As I’ve gotten older, my family has come to mean more and more to me. I love them and miss them all the more on the holidays.)
I miss the hugs my big brother Kirk and him calling me “baby boy”. Kirk is a big guy with a heart to match. I miss the protectiveness and steadiness of my big sister Marian. Memories of her laugh always make me smile. I miss the sensitivity of my little brother Steve. He is the lost sheep of sorts. We often get cross with one another, but I’ve never, never, never stopped believing in him and I KNOW beyond any measure of doubt he feels the same about me. Even though we drive the other nuts at times, he’s still my brother and if you mess with him, I’ll send you into the sweet by and by.
It goes without saying, but I must… I miss Sean and Tim. They are the two single most important people in the world to me. They taught me to lighten up during with is usually a very heavy time for me. I miss seeing thing laugh and joke and play with Sholanda, Sharese, Tot, Stevie, Marquis, and all of their other cousins. And there are many cousins. I miss the goofiness of Taylor, Trinity, and Ellis and how goofy they make my brother Kirk.
I miss the way my Aunt Lula’s eyes squint when she smiles and they way my Aunt Sam calls me “baby” and “sweetheart”. I miss the thought provoking conversations with my cousin Reggie, my uncle Art and Uncle Brother. (Yeah, you read that right. There is somebody in every family with a nickname that is a little confusing if you’re not in the family.)
I miss the continuous laughter when we are together. We don’t just love each other, we actually LIKE each other.
I miss hearing people call me Papa, Uncle Darryl, D, D.A., Preacher (my Grandmother used to call me that) and the occasional, “What’s your name again?” You really have to see how many people we can squeeze into one room.
I miss the freckles that are such a common trait in the Parker clan. My grandmother had them, my momma had them, all her brothers and sisters have, me and my brothers and sister have them, and all my cousins of a certain age have them. They come later in life. It’s a family trait that is undeniable.
I miss the food. GOD how I miss the food! I am especially craving my sister Marian’s spaghetti and macaroni and cheese!
I miss the quiet confident smile of my favorite…. Ok, well actually, technically she’s my only formal, Sister-in-Law Theresa. She and Karen my other Sister-in-Law, sort of, have been in this family since our high school days.
I will miss my dad. My Dad is the BEST man I know. Did I say I love that man? I Love that man. My dad is strong, steady and gentle. Most everything I know about kindness and patience, I learn from him. I learned just from watching him. He is completely unflappable. And his wife Juanita, is as thoughtful a woman as I know. We’ve always gotten along well.
My Family, God Bless ‘em, is a mish-mash of all that is good in the world. We’ve got it all. Black, White, Asian, Gay, Straight, Conservative, Liberal, Radicals… You name it and you just might be able to say… “Yeah, that is so much like……..” There are those with whom I share no blood or legal tie through marriage, that are as much family with every right, privilege, and burden that comes with every family. And to be perfectly honest, when I’m analyzing the family, as in moments like this, is the ONLY time it really dawns on me. But each is loved as much as if they were blood.
At the top I mentioned this being a religious holiday. It IS and always will be for me. I need not say anything else. I don’t miss it. It is ever present in my life. My faith and ALL associated with it makes it possible for me to withstand these waves of emotion. I really don’t know how other people survive the vicissitudes of life. I know it’s the main reason I’m still standing. Every man or woman walks there own path. And that’s OK too.
This holiday is Big for me. Maybe I didn’t know just how much until it kept creeping closer and closer. The closer it got the heavier my heart became. I share this with you, so you know just how blessed a person I am. I’ve got these great wonderful people that are inextricably woven into the very fiber of who I am. And we love to be together on Christmas.
As you have no doubt deduced at this point, I can't ignore Christmas, even if I tried. Embracing it in the best way I know how is the only option.
Peace On Earth. Good Will To Men
MERRY CHRISTMAS
戴格智
(also known as Papa, Uncle Darryl, D, D.A., Preacher, or just simply ….. Darryl)
Peace
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Moms, kids, and motorcycles
Where in the World is D Today?
Wondering how Sean and Tim would do on a motorbike... as kids?
I've adjusted in my brain my thoughts on children and scooters. Yeah, it's really dangerous, but it's a normal part of life in Taiwan. When I see kids on scooters now, I think its really cute, their innocence and seeming lack of fear. The smaller ones cling to their mom like baby Koala bears, with a helmet. Often kids stand in front of their mom or dad and hang on to the braces of the mirrors. They are "one" with the scooter.
A few weeks ago, the weather was warm and I went for a walk. While waiting for a cup of lemon green tea from my favorite tea stand, I noticed a mom getting her kids prepared for their ride. I'm guess the kids were maybe 6 and 9 years old. It's hard to tell, Taiwan kids are really small. Anyway.... she helped the younger get his little helmet on, backed the motorbike out of the space, steadied and the kids proceeded to get on. The younger stood in front of mom, nestled between her arms. The older child was struggling to climb on the back. And like something off of the nature channel, I see mom's arm reach back, lift the kid into place, makes sure she's settled and safe, the kid reaching around moms waist and off they go. The moment was pure and sweet.
This scene probably plays outs hundreds of times a day. Parents are parents all over the world. They want they kid safe and well. As I watched this, I reflected back to when Sean and Tim where young. Would the scene played out as normally as that one did? Would I be criticized for putting them on the motorbike with me? Would they have been as willing and trusting to get on it with me?
I think the answer to all of those questions are yes. I would probably get arrested for child endangerment in the U.S. Would the boys have trusted me, of course they would have, that's what kids do. And they would have been chatting up a storm, just like I see Taiwan kids do with their parents.
The question to really ask is, "Would the Darryl of his early mid 30's been willing to ride with his kids on a scooter?" The answer to that question is no, assuming a scooter would have been available to me. The 40 something Darryl sees more possibility now. I'm smarter now. I'm still a bit of a worry-wort at times, It's my nature.
When the day comes to go back to the U.S., and who knows when that might be, a motor scooter is definately in the plan. And if there's any way I can make sure the boys have one too, I will. It will be a gas crusin' with the boys on scooters!!
That thought makes me smile really big!
Peace
戴格智
Wondering how Sean and Tim would do on a motorbike... as kids?
I've adjusted in my brain my thoughts on children and scooters. Yeah, it's really dangerous, but it's a normal part of life in Taiwan. When I see kids on scooters now, I think its really cute, their innocence and seeming lack of fear. The smaller ones cling to their mom like baby Koala bears, with a helmet. Often kids stand in front of their mom or dad and hang on to the braces of the mirrors. They are "one" with the scooter.
A few weeks ago, the weather was warm and I went for a walk. While waiting for a cup of lemon green tea from my favorite tea stand, I noticed a mom getting her kids prepared for their ride. I'm guess the kids were maybe 6 and 9 years old. It's hard to tell, Taiwan kids are really small. Anyway.... she helped the younger get his little helmet on, backed the motorbike out of the space, steadied and the kids proceeded to get on. The younger stood in front of mom, nestled between her arms. The older child was struggling to climb on the back. And like something off of the nature channel, I see mom's arm reach back, lift the kid into place, makes sure she's settled and safe, the kid reaching around moms waist and off they go. The moment was pure and sweet.
This scene probably plays outs hundreds of times a day. Parents are parents all over the world. They want they kid safe and well. As I watched this, I reflected back to when Sean and Tim where young. Would the scene played out as normally as that one did? Would I be criticized for putting them on the motorbike with me? Would they have been as willing and trusting to get on it with me?
I think the answer to all of those questions are yes. I would probably get arrested for child endangerment in the U.S. Would the boys have trusted me, of course they would have, that's what kids do. And they would have been chatting up a storm, just like I see Taiwan kids do with their parents.
The question to really ask is, "Would the Darryl of his early mid 30's been willing to ride with his kids on a scooter?" The answer to that question is no, assuming a scooter would have been available to me. The 40 something Darryl sees more possibility now. I'm smarter now. I'm still a bit of a worry-wort at times, It's my nature.
When the day comes to go back to the U.S., and who knows when that might be, a motor scooter is definately in the plan. And if there's any way I can make sure the boys have one too, I will. It will be a gas crusin' with the boys on scooters!!
That thought makes me smile really big!
Peace
戴格智
Thoughts at 45KPM
Where in the World is D Today?
Cruisin', Thinking, talking to Brutus.
Here are some recent thoughts I've had on while traveling from here to there.
"This is kinda FUN."
"Are you serious?!"
"Lean"
"Dude! Why did you buy me if you're going to walk?" "Shut up, sometimes I like to walk, OK?"
"I'm really glad I have a full face visor!"
"Shit, the visor fogged up I can't see!"
"How did my hands get so dirty? Now I see while Will washes his hands every morning when he comes in."
"Darryl, don't be so nice. You're gonna cause an accident. Just Go!"
"Hmm, never been in a traffic jam on the sidewalk before. Oh Crap! Sorry!"
"Woah! Where did that come from?!"
"Mad props to women in a skirt and pumps! This is difficult enough in jeans and sneakers."
"Jack, there's a problem with my motorbike." (Jack showed up 20 minutes later. The speedometer cable broke and was hanging off. He couldn't fix it then. So we went and had a beer. I walked home for the record. I DO NOT drink and drive. Not even 1!)
"When did he come fix it?!" (I opened up my motorbike seat to discover a note on my helmet. Jack came to my school. Picked up my bike, took it to his shop, fixed it, and brought it back. JACK IS MY BOY!!!!)
"OMG, it's so freakin' cold! My hands are frozen!"
"I'm glad Jack put new tires on this thing"
"I should have walked. Brutus you're to fat for me to park in this space."
"OUCH!! Son of a .....!" (My foot slipped when I was putting Brutus up on the kick stand. My left foot ended up Under the kick stand with the full weight the bike on my toes.)
"OK, crashing into the 7-11 would be bad!"
"A parking space by the gate of my apartment. SWEET!"
"Rode to work, the Supermarket, a restaurant for dinner and back home without dying. I think I can do this!"
Peace
戴格智
Cruisin', Thinking, talking to Brutus.
Here are some recent thoughts I've had on while traveling from here to there.
"This is kinda FUN."
"Are you serious?!"
"Lean"
"Dude! Why did you buy me if you're going to walk?" "Shut up, sometimes I like to walk, OK?"
"I'm really glad I have a full face visor!"
"Shit, the visor fogged up I can't see!"
"How did my hands get so dirty? Now I see while Will washes his hands every morning when he comes in."
"Darryl, don't be so nice. You're gonna cause an accident. Just Go!"
"Hmm, never been in a traffic jam on the sidewalk before. Oh Crap! Sorry!"
"Woah! Where did that come from?!"
"Mad props to women in a skirt and pumps! This is difficult enough in jeans and sneakers."
"Jack, there's a problem with my motorbike." (Jack showed up 20 minutes later. The speedometer cable broke and was hanging off. He couldn't fix it then. So we went and had a beer. I walked home for the record. I DO NOT drink and drive. Not even 1!)
"When did he come fix it?!" (I opened up my motorbike seat to discover a note on my helmet. Jack came to my school. Picked up my bike, took it to his shop, fixed it, and brought it back. JACK IS MY BOY!!!!)
"OMG, it's so freakin' cold! My hands are frozen!"
"I'm glad Jack put new tires on this thing"
"I should have walked. Brutus you're to fat for me to park in this space."
"OUCH!! Son of a .....!" (My foot slipped when I was putting Brutus up on the kick stand. My left foot ended up Under the kick stand with the full weight the bike on my toes.)
"OK, crashing into the 7-11 would be bad!"
"A parking space by the gate of my apartment. SWEET!"
"Rode to work, the Supermarket, a restaurant for dinner and back home without dying. I think I can do this!"
Peace
戴格智
Seeing The World Faster Is Kinda Cool
Where in the World is D Today?
Contemplating the extinction of Dinosaurs and Survival of the fittest.
Let me first begin with, I believe completely and without reservation, that God created the heavens and the earth. No doubt in my mind at all. So let's take that off the table. But I also know there is some scientific evidence that some species have indeed developed, adapted, changed, dare I even say "evolved" over time. I don't know enough about the science of it to speak as an authority. I'm clearly NOT. If I were to combine the two ideas of creation and the idea of survival of the fittest, I would have to quote the comedian Katt Williams when he spoke about the guy who got killed in a tigers cage at the zoo. "If you are an adult, and If you get killed by a Tiger, And you get killed by a tiger in a zoo, AND you get killed inside the tigers cage at the zoo, Then I think God's will has been done for your life." (Think about that for a minute or two before you read on.)
Some things are naturally easy for me; for example dancing. Some things are naturally difficult; for example swimming, and mathematics. And some things I can learn to be competent at inspite of the difficulty; for example learning Chinese. Note I didn't say I was the best dancer or fluent in Chinese. I said it came naturally or I could be competent. The difficult things, well if I had to swim farther than 30 meters or do Calculus to save my life, start making the funeral arrangements. I physically can not manage swimming well. I've tried to learn to swim and I'm just really, really bad at it.
Now I find myself on the streets of Taiwan on a motorscooter. I am not culturally suited for it. We love our cars in the U.S.A. BUT I do have enough eye hand coordination and sense of balance that I am becoming more and more competent at it. Will I ever drive like a Taiwan person who probably quite literally grew up on a scooter? Not likely. I am less nervous today than I was 2 weeks ago. My senses, especially visual, have gotten sharper. I see things more clearly now and my reaction to them is quicker. A good way to describe it is when I first began to ride, everything seemed a little out of focus because there was so much new information being processed. Now, it's the same in formation, but now, it is all in focus. I am in essense becoming more fit for survival. I'm adapting.
So what does this have to do with the extinction of dinosaurs? Well, there is a body of evidence that supports a huge event, such as a large meteor crashing into the earth, that in essence caused the dinosaurs to die. In short, adaptation had nothing to do with it. The dinosaurs were doing just fine. They were minding there own business, when this huge thing falls out of the sky and wreaks havoc in the dinosaur world. Talk about having a bad day. Try having a meteor fall on you while you're eating a tree for lunch.
My ultimate point here is that none us are entirely insulated from the winds of chance. I can learn to drive my motorbike safely and effeciently. But you never know when an idiot is going into a tigers cage. Bad drivers don't only exist in Taiwan. Where ever there's a motor vehicle and a person in the world, there's going to be "those" drivers.
I still believe in the basic goodness of people, but I trust more in the hedge of protection that so many pray for on my behave. In either case, I'm gonna be OK on my scooter, and my feet don't hurt as much!
Good Luck
戴格智
Contemplating the extinction of Dinosaurs and Survival of the fittest.
Let me first begin with, I believe completely and without reservation, that God created the heavens and the earth. No doubt in my mind at all. So let's take that off the table. But I also know there is some scientific evidence that some species have indeed developed, adapted, changed, dare I even say "evolved" over time. I don't know enough about the science of it to speak as an authority. I'm clearly NOT. If I were to combine the two ideas of creation and the idea of survival of the fittest, I would have to quote the comedian Katt Williams when he spoke about the guy who got killed in a tigers cage at the zoo. "If you are an adult, and If you get killed by a Tiger, And you get killed by a tiger in a zoo, AND you get killed inside the tigers cage at the zoo, Then I think God's will has been done for your life." (Think about that for a minute or two before you read on.)
Some things are naturally easy for me; for example dancing. Some things are naturally difficult; for example swimming, and mathematics. And some things I can learn to be competent at inspite of the difficulty; for example learning Chinese. Note I didn't say I was the best dancer or fluent in Chinese. I said it came naturally or I could be competent. The difficult things, well if I had to swim farther than 30 meters or do Calculus to save my life, start making the funeral arrangements. I physically can not manage swimming well. I've tried to learn to swim and I'm just really, really bad at it.
Now I find myself on the streets of Taiwan on a motorscooter. I am not culturally suited for it. We love our cars in the U.S.A. BUT I do have enough eye hand coordination and sense of balance that I am becoming more and more competent at it. Will I ever drive like a Taiwan person who probably quite literally grew up on a scooter? Not likely. I am less nervous today than I was 2 weeks ago. My senses, especially visual, have gotten sharper. I see things more clearly now and my reaction to them is quicker. A good way to describe it is when I first began to ride, everything seemed a little out of focus because there was so much new information being processed. Now, it's the same in formation, but now, it is all in focus. I am in essense becoming more fit for survival. I'm adapting.
So what does this have to do with the extinction of dinosaurs? Well, there is a body of evidence that supports a huge event, such as a large meteor crashing into the earth, that in essence caused the dinosaurs to die. In short, adaptation had nothing to do with it. The dinosaurs were doing just fine. They were minding there own business, when this huge thing falls out of the sky and wreaks havoc in the dinosaur world. Talk about having a bad day. Try having a meteor fall on you while you're eating a tree for lunch.
My ultimate point here is that none us are entirely insulated from the winds of chance. I can learn to drive my motorbike safely and effeciently. But you never know when an idiot is going into a tigers cage. Bad drivers don't only exist in Taiwan. Where ever there's a motor vehicle and a person in the world, there's going to be "those" drivers.
I still believe in the basic goodness of people, but I trust more in the hedge of protection that so many pray for on my behave. In either case, I'm gonna be OK on my scooter, and my feet don't hurt as much!
Good Luck
戴格智
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Meet Brutus
Where in The World is D Today?
Building what I hope is Safe and Healthy Relationship.
Say Hello to Brutus, my motorbike. Brutus is the latest part of my transition to life in Taiwan. Brutus was brought to me by Jack. Jack is a motorcycle repairman and works for Suzuki, and probably one of my deepest friends in Taiwan. More about Jack later. This posting is about this beast.
Why the name Brutus?! Like always with me, it's a metaphor and a geeky historical reference. Brutus, also known as Julius Caesar, was an Emperor in Rome. When he crossed the Rubicon and returned to Rome, it changed the course of history in Rome. If you want the whole story you have to look it up. The point here is getting a motorbike can change my life in pretty dramatically. Hopefully I won't have the same ending as Julius Ceasar. As you've read before traffic in Taiwan is no joke. But, I am a big boy. My personal safety and not dying are HIGH PRIORITIES for me. Yes, I will be careful. I promise.
Another reason I named my bike Brutus is just because the thing is BIG. Yeah, I know it doesn't look that big is the pictures. Trust me, in comparison to other motorbikes, it IS. Especially the front. It's really FAT!
Good Luck
戴格智
Building what I hope is Safe and Healthy Relationship.
Say Hello to Brutus, my motorbike. Brutus is the latest part of my transition to life in Taiwan. Brutus was brought to me by Jack. Jack is a motorcycle repairman and works for Suzuki, and probably one of my deepest friends in Taiwan. More about Jack later. This posting is about this beast.
Why the name Brutus?! Like always with me, it's a metaphor and a geeky historical reference. Brutus, also known as Julius Caesar, was an Emperor in Rome. When he crossed the Rubicon and returned to Rome, it changed the course of history in Rome. If you want the whole story you have to look it up. The point here is getting a motorbike can change my life in pretty dramatically. Hopefully I won't have the same ending as Julius Ceasar. As you've read before traffic in Taiwan is no joke. But, I am a big boy. My personal safety and not dying are HIGH PRIORITIES for me. Yes, I will be careful. I promise.
Another reason I named my bike Brutus is just because the thing is BIG. Yeah, I know it doesn't look that big is the pictures. Trust me, in comparison to other motorbikes, it IS. Especially the front. It's really FAT!
Good Luck
戴格智
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