Lost and Sought love

Where in the World is D today?

Reflecting on his lost loves.

In my header I mentioned one of the reflective topics would be love lost. I've been avoiding it up to now. There were multiple reasons but the biggest was fear. I was afraid to dig up old bones fearing they would haunt me the rest of my natural days. But unearthing old bones is the best way to ultimately and permanently lay them to rest.

The pretty lady in the picture up there is Jenny. (There was a picture, but after being called some very bad names. I took the picture off. Nothing else in this entry has been changed.) Jenny was the woman of my dreams mentioned in my very first blog entry. We have a long and what I can only describe as "odd", but mostly good, history. What makes it odd is of no relevance here. What made it special was that for a short and absolutely fabulous time it my life, I was truly head over heels, walk through fire and do incredibly stupid things in love with Jenny. I've got a "killer deer" (inside joke with Jenny and her girls), A Webkin named Maneater, and pics of us with me and that big goofy smile to prove it. People who knew me well, could see the difference she made in my life.

But, this good thing came to an end. (By the way, I just don't believe the phrase "all good things must come to and end." What a terribly sad way to live.) But in this case this did. At first I truly thought it was the end of the world for me. But with the love and support of family and one very dear friend, Greta, I got over the hump. I went from "If I see her, I'm going to dive under the table" to "If I see her, I see her." I didn't think about it much when I said it. Then a few days later for a reason that escapes me now, I said jokingly to another person, "I am sooooo over her." Then in an instant later, I thought out loud, "Ya know, I really am." Hmmm? When did that happen?!

Greta tells me Jenny has found a new love and plans to marry him. Bully for her. Finding love is a hard thing to do. I know. I've tried and tried. I have absolutely no desire to attend their wedding, though I admit I have not been asked. But, could we be friends again someday.....? Probably, under the right circumstances.

So what about my own quest for love? Well, I know it's out there somewhere? I've been told many many times to be patient. It'll happen when I least suspect it. HAH! Is my retort to that! I'll be patient as a last resort. But why should I? Tell me, who amongst those of us romantics out there doesn't want ALL that a deep loving relationship has to offer, and want's it right now! Tomorrow's not promised to any of us.

I'm sure I'll write more about this quest later. But for now, this will do.